Entry number 2: it’s 12:47
and I wanted my entry to be heard for the day of Friday, even through
technically I'm writing this Saturday morning. Yesterday a lot of people got
under the impression that I was depressed, that was one of the many things I
thought about today, I don't mean to sound like that, it’s the way I feel. I’ve
learned through all my adversity, through my life threatening surgery in 2008,
that even when times get rough, I may be upset about it but one thing I can't
be is depressed. I always look at the positives, the fact is I'm alive and that
I have great family and friends in the suburbs. My blog yesterday describes the
other side of me when I'm in Philadelphia, the outcast.it is not permanent.it
is only temporary. I also thought it's almost two months since my first heartbreak.
To tell you the truth do I still think about her? Yes, do I want her back?no.Me
going back would be like a bad episode of your favorite soap opera, it wouldn't
end well for me.I'm happier that I'm handling it better now, I've always been
told it is hard to get over something you love. Like when I lost my dog to the
shelter when I was 12. The pain I had with her was probably worse. There’s
someone in my mind now that I miss, she’s been buzzing in my head for a while
but I don't think the feelings will be returned. It’s not something I want to
endure again. I can't take the slightest of break up for someone so maybe my
words are better kept a secret. She’s always been there for me, and I found her
to be amazing. She was there for me even in the days when I was sick. When I
came out of coma she was the one I first texted.to have her again would be a
miracle. But a man can only dream
Sincerely yours...
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